When Dane and I started planning our wedding, my parents and I purchased a couple of books to help us. There are so many rules and etiquette regulations and traditions that must be adhered to, we needed some guides. So we have an Emily Post wedding etiquette book and a Miss Manners wedding book. I absolutely love these books and think they've make our lives so much easier! However, they come with all kinds of rules that tend to bug me. So here are the things we're not allowed to say or do but that I really want to, so I've decided to say them via blog, where anything goes!
*disclaimer: this includes traditional wedding faux pas, some of which you may have used in your own weddings. I don't publish them here to offend you, I publish them here to make my own point. I don't really give a crap if my pointing out your errors hurts your feelings. Clearly you were trashy enough to make these errors without realizing they were errors, so just understand that and move on. If your feelings are hurt, you're in the wrong place to begin with because I simply don't care. Read someone else's blog. Think you're thick-skinned enough to continue? Read on and enjoy!
+ 1? My wedding is not the place for your math games:
I have a major issue with the idea of "+1". If I specifically invited your date, meaning by name, that means I want you to bring said date. If I didn't, that means I invited you and not some random stranger you decide to scrounge up and bring to my nuptials. And how, you wonder, will I specify if your date is invited? His/her name will BE ON THE ENVELOPE. Oh, your envelope just has YOUR name on it? Weird! Must mean you don't have to deal with the hassle of finding someone to bring! Congratulations! You are welcome! I know this will probably piss many people off, as they think that weddings are meant for bringing a date and enjoying the open bar. This is odd to me because I thought weddings were about two people coming together to join a new unit together in love and start their own little family. But you're probably right, your random stranger idea is probably more what it's about. My issue with the random stranger is a two-part issue: the first being that it simply makes the numbers impossible. I have never wanted to have a massive wedding and adding a +1 for everyone simply makes it bigger than I want it to be, and obviously more expensive for my parents. But the second part of my issue with the +1 is that I don't know your stupid date, so why is he/she there to watch me get married?! I want to have people at the wedding because they're important to Dane or me or our parents, not because someone we know met them a couple weeks ago and thought they'd be fun to dance with. No. If we don't know you, you can't come. Read the envelope and use your brain.
Registry secrets:
According to one of our wedding books, it's a major no-no to put where you're registered on the invitation. This is because it assumes your invited guests are expected to buy you gifts and they are expected to find said gifts at stores you chose. And while you were at it, you chose the specific gifts, too. I get why this is tacky. However, everyone knows you registered, so now they have to hunt down people who might know where you're registered and find out from them. Why can't we just make it easy and list it somewhere? Somewhere convenient. Like the invitation. So... just to save our guests the hassle of hunting for our registries, we are registered at TARGET, CRATE & BARREL, and MACY'S. Go crazy.
No boys (or girls) allowed:
This relates to my previous point regarding added dates, but this is specifically regarding children. If your invitation doesn't specifically list your children or "and family", then I don't want to have your kids at my wedding. It's nothing personal, I'm sure your kids are great. But did you know that the $30+ they charge per person for an open bar is also charged for kids under 21? The resort apparently thinks that kids can drink $30+ worth of soda in a four hour period, so they still change the same price. I'm sure your kids are very sweet, but if they're not chugging their weight in soda, I don't want them. Because if they're going to be there, they'd better be drinking enough to make it worth the cost! But even before we get to the reception, I don't want your sticky-handed, whining child being obnoxious while I'm having a moment with my pop as he walks me down the aisle. Children should be seen and not heard, just not at my wedding. They can be seen elsewhere.
R.S.V.P., A.S.S.H.O.L.E.:
So according to these books that rule my life, including a response card in an invitation is tacky. The proper way to respond to an invitation is to do so in the same medium and formality as the invitation. That would mean that for my formal invitations, everyone who receives them should pull out their formal stationary and hand write a letter back to my parents, either accepting or sharing their regrets about being unable to attend. The second he read this, my dad decided that we, too would go with the formal option and skip response cards. Um... NO. There is NO WAY IN HELL I'm depending on people knowing they should write a freaking letter to RSVP. If we chose that option, we'd expect 20 people and be surprised when 150 actually showed up. No. We're being socially white trash and including response cards. I even took it to another level and included "number attending" on the response cards to REALLY get it nailed down. I am WAY too much of a control freak to depend on other people to get their shit together. I will get your shit together FOR you. So freaking mail back your response card because I even effing addressed and stamped it for you.
Thanks for the tip:
This has nothing to do with our wedding books, but it's pretty much my biggest wedding pet peeve EVER. Please stop giving me advice about weddings and referencing your friend's wedding, or even worse: YOUR wedding. I'm getting way too close to my own wedding date, thus short on patience/a zen attitude to think of nice ways to tell you I think you're trashy. Seriously, it's getting hard for me to be politically correct when inside I'm thinking "Holy crap, you seriously DID that? No thanks, I'm from Paradise Valley, not a trailer park" So let's just keep everyone happy; you can stop giving me real life examples and I can stop giving myself anxiety attacks while I try to think of something nice to say. Well no, you can continue to give me real life examples, but let's say "I read in a magazine somewhere" instead, because then I'll feel like less of a bitch when I burst into hysterical laughter and make a snotty comment. K thanks.
Monday, March 7, 2011
Sunday, January 2, 2011
Nothing rhymes with 2011
Happy New Year! Daneish and I had a great weekend so I thought I would share the details with all of you! He got back in town late Thursday night and we got him all settled in and unpacked. He also told me he had made reservations for dinner on New Years Eve! Hooray! We usually spend NYE on the couch with pizza or some other kind of non-homemade food and watch a movie or something. NYE is not usually a holiday we really celebrate. This is because several years ago at the block party in Tempe, a random girl ran up to Dane, punched him in the face, and ran off. This put a bit of a damper on Daneish's enjoyment of this holiday... But, we decided to ditch tradition an actually celebrate this year! Dane spent his Friday getting tons done for us! He took my car in to get my windshield wiper repaired, bought the windshield wiper fluid we needed, and took care of all the annoying little errands that needed to be done. It was really handy to have such a great helper working on things while I was at work! I begged and begged at work for them to let me off early so I could make it home in time to change clothes before our big date. They did and I made it home at 6, just in time to change and head out for our 6:30 reservations at Spezia! I wore a super cute black Ann Taylor dress with a skinny black belt, magenta cardigan, and black pointy toe pumps. Of course, this outfit did not have style room for stockings, so I went bare-legged. It was super cute, but obviously freaking cold when entering/exiting the restaurant in the 10 degree weather. I still feel I made the right choice. Fashion over function ANY day! We raced over to Spezia and had an AMAZING meal!! We had calamari, salads, and steaks! Dane enjoyed a couple glasses of wine while I chose a Bellini :) The food was super yummy and I was stuffed by the time the entrées arrived, so I brought most of mine home and have been able to make 2 more meals out of it! It was so nice to be able to sit down and enjoy a fancy dinner together and not worry about work or school the next day. It totally blew our budget, but it was totally worth it. We'll be eating ramen for the rest of the month, but I'm so glad we had a nice date! Funny side note: when we got into the car to go home, there was a man getting into his car and obviously heading back to the front of the restaurant to pick up his wife. I made a snide comment about how nice he was and Dane responded with "yeah, that IS nice, nice that his wife is such a lazy whore." Obviously, chivalry is alive and well... When we got home, we got into our comfy clothes and settled in to watch some tv. Of course, I feel asleep, just like I always do. But Dane woke me up from time to time to show me the tuxedos he had "built" on a website (they were all hideous. WHERE have all the classic black and white tuxedos gone?!) and he woke me up again just in time for midnight! He had even opened the cheapy bottle of Andre I'd bought and poured us each a glass. The champagne was obviously terrible, but I'm glad we had it. We slept in the next morning and it was super nice to not HAVE to get up. I did a bunch of laundry and started our black eyed peas. BTW, the package of peas I bought called them "Blackeye Peas". Um... that's weird. Anyway, Saturday was great! Got lots accomplished AND we went together to put air in our tires (kind of an ordeal b/c the first 2 gas stations we went to didn't have working air pumps. Super annoying in 17 degree weather!), get gas, and grab the makings for corn bread! These annoying chores are way more fun when we get to do them together. And we can start off our busy month knowing our cars are both good to go! We spent our evening watching TCU win the Rose Bowl while eating black eyed peas and corn bread. We should be set for good luck in 2011! (Not that we'll need it b/c 2010 was freaking amazing and I know 2011 will be even better) Sunday was started with good intentions, but then we got lazy together. Dane set his alarm so he could get up and get ready to go to church with me, but then he hit snooze and I followed suit and got lazy, too. So instead of church together, we spent our morning laying around the house together. I would feel more guilty about it, but I so rarely get lazy time with Daneish, I'm fine with taking it when I can get it! Then I got my butt into gear and finally made myself useful. I put together our chili for dinner so it could simmer for a couple hours and packed away all the Christmas decorations. I had also planned to clean the house and do a bunch of ironing, but the streaming Netflix on our new Blu-ray player was calling my name, so I wasted a couple hours with that. Anyway, Daneish spent his weekend being super helpful and it really meant a lot to me. I do a lot around here when he's in school, so it really meant a lot that he was so helpful when he was available. He did the dishes every chance he got and was great about walking Eddie, too. We spent a bunch of time talking about wedding music, tuxedos, and honeymoon options. So it was a great weekend together. It actually felt like a vacation, which seems silly because we were A) home and B) actually doing lots of chores, etc. But if this weekend was this great, I can't imagine how awesome a real vacation (ie our honeymoon) is going to be!
January is going to be a super tough month for both of us b/c of our work and school requirements, but I think we're going to get through it just fine. We'll be eating hot dogs and ramen, but we'll make it through. AND with how much I'll be working, hot dogs and ramen are the only meals I'll have the time to cook anyway. So happy 2011, everyone! I hope your weekend was as great as mine! And I hope the rest of your January is better than mine will be! Mazel!
January is going to be a super tough month for both of us b/c of our work and school requirements, but I think we're going to get through it just fine. We'll be eating hot dogs and ramen, but we'll make it through. AND with how much I'll be working, hot dogs and ramen are the only meals I'll have the time to cook anyway. So happy 2011, everyone! I hope your weekend was as great as mine! And I hope the rest of your January is better than mine will be! Mazel!
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
I don't get it
As a blonde, there are many things I don't understand. Here are the ones that confuse/bother me the most:
Charmin Extra Strong: HOW HARD ARE YOU PEOPLE WIPING YOUR ASSES? I have never had this thought after doing my business: "Oh no! Pieces left behind! If only they made stronger toilet paper to accommodate my super human butt wiping strength!" It's a sensitive area people, be gentle! And it's not going to run away, it's your own stationary ass, you don't need to trap it. Simply clean up and move on. Calm down before you go there. I don't get it.
McDonald's McRib Sandwich: um... gross. For one thing, I'm never eating "rib meat" from McDonald's. But more importantly, why is it shaped like an actual rack of ribs? Most people are aware that a rack of ribs includes bones between the rib meat. So is McDonald's trying to simulate bones but instead of using actual bones, it's processed "rib meat"? That's horrifying. What would possibly posses someone to eat such a wretched piece of OBVIOUSLY fake food? I mean let's all be honest here, ALL of the food at McDonald's is fake, but at least it's shaped realistically like the real deal. McRib isn't something I'd touch with a ten foot pole. Fake meat shaped like bones. I don't get it.
Inappropriate suggestions for wedding registries: We have a few registries at different stores and one of them comes with suggestions about what to put on your registry. Great, right? Except some of them are completely inappropriate! A few of them are for lady shavers. Like I'm going to put that on my registry and say to every guest who looks at it "Hi wedding guest! Want to buy us this trimmer so I can keep up my lady bits?" Um... no thanks. WHO would add that to their registry? I feel uncomfortable enough adding an electric toothbrush to our registry! I need a new electric toothbrush and it's a totally normal thing, but it just feels too personal for a registry! Same goes for sheets! (We are, in fact, registering for sheets and an electric toothbrush, but it still feels weird). What employee thought that was a good suggestion? It's awkward! I don't get it.
Panda Express and their fork stinginess: Every couple of weeks Dane and I have Panda Express as our Friday night dinner "out". I pick it up on my way home from work. I get 2 3-item meals (don't judge how much I eat, I eat the leftovers the next day, jerks). Sometimes I go through the drive-thru, sometimes I go in an order at the counter. But it's always 2 meals. And every time they give me 1 or NO fork(s)! Do I look like I'm going to eat both meals? Come on! And when they don't give me any forks: am I supposed to eat both meals with my hands? The Pandas in AZ are pros at the fork distribution. They give you two napkins and a fork for every meal. Perfection. They're good at the fortune cookie hand out too. Not here. These rookies are new in town and it shows. Just hand out the number of forks equal to the number of meals I got. Why is this so difficult for them? I don't get it.
Dorothy Lynch salad dressing: For everyone who doesn't live in Nebraska or Iowa, Dorothy Lynch dressing is this hugely popular dressing that you can only find in the Midwest. Everyone here is obsessed with it. They talk about it like you're stupid for not knowing what is it and they're all shocked that it's not a national product. Um... here's the thing: it IS a national product. Except everywhere else, we just call it French dressing. So get off your Midwestern high horse and relax. We've all had it before but aren't obsessed with it because French dressing sucks. Stop acting like it's such a big deal, no one cares. I don't get it.
Husker football: The is by far the most annoying part of living in Nebraska. I don't mind the cold and I don't mind the snow, but the obsession with the local college football team makes me want to punch babies. It's a college football team. They're in the Holiday Bowl against Washington. I don't want to ruin the ending for you, but Nebraska's going to win. Get a hobby. Might I suggest building a Macy's or Nordstrom? Because I would much rather hear about those things than your silly football team. Maybe if they were a professional team, I'd care. But they're not, so I don't. Stop acting like Husker football is a religion. I'm Presbyterian, not Huskerian. I don't get it.
How Bravo thinks this new sham of a show The Fashion Show is somehow going to make up for their lack of Project Runway: Um... no. I don't know these people, I don't care about their designs, and I'd like to know why Iman is so angry all the time. You had the perfect fashion design show and you blew it. Don't try to make up for it now with Isaac Mizrahi. But you're lucky, this week's episode with the Housewives may have just saved you. But only because you got Dina from NJ. Don't think this success of me watching is going to continue for much longer. Why would you ever get rid of Project Runway?! I don't get it.
Those commercials for medical assistant schools: They always go something like this: "I used to hate my job, but then after a few short months at this craptacular school, I have a great job where I work alongside doctors!" Ok let's start off at the beginning on this one: I feel there are very few careers worth doing that take "only a few short months" of school to be prepare for. But that's not even the big picture here. The big picture is how we're supposed to believe that working alongside doctors is some kind of dream come true. Now if you happen to have a career that coincidentally is near where doctors work, (ie R.N.) then good for you. Your job is legit. But whatever it is that these "few short months" careers entail, I can assure you that the treat of working alongside a doctor is not going to make up for it. Because where is the prize in working alongside a doctor? You know who's going to be a doctor? Dane. You know who I would never want to work alongside? Dane. Clearly, I'm a pretty big fan of Daneish. In our at-home, non-work related lives. Dane wouldn't want to work alongside me and vice versa. I'm annoying and fake at work. Dane will be a stubborn, egotistical asshole at work. I pity the people who will have to work with him. At least in our relationship, I can tell him to shut the hell up and we can bicker and go back to having fun together. You can't do that at work. Especially if your coworker is a doctor and you went to school "for a few short months". Just sayin', that confrontation is not going to go your way or end in your favor. I don't care if this one makes me sound like an bitch with a bachelors degree. This bitch worked hard for that degree. Let's talk about people who are too lazy to go to real college. I don't get it.
People who "don't really watch tv": um... why the hell not? People who say crap like that are usually the most annoying people ever. And watching the Real Housewives or The Sing-Off never hurt anyone! So stop being pretentious and watch some freaking tv. Maybe it'll help remove that stick from your ass. And while you're at it, stop trying to talk to me about music like it matters. My favorite kind on music? Christmas music. So stop acting all hipster on me and leave me alone. Watch some Bravo and then we'll talk. But not watching tv? I don't get it.
Why wine is so expensive: it's old grapes, right? They take grapes and smash them and then let them go bad while they sit in old barrels. Why does this gross process allow them to charge so much for a bottle of the fermented smashed grapes? I will admit, it's clearly delicious, so that adds some cost to the yummy, but where does the rest of the price come into play? Stop making me poor just so I can enjoy a glass of wine after a long day of dealing with the general public! Why must wine be so out of my budget? I don't get it.
Why iPhone users are such assholes. There's no story behind this one because everyone is fully aware of it. If you have an iPhone, you're probably an asshole. Congrats on being the friend that nobody likes. I don't care about all of the things your phone can do that my blackberry can't. I don't use my blackberry to its full capacity as it is, I don't need to add an annoying touch screen and an elitist attitude to become an iPhone user. So suck it. If it's so simple and user-friendly, why are you such an asshole? I don't get it.
Alright folks, that's all I have for now. We all know there are millions of other things I don't get. These are simply the ones that stand out to me right now. Peace out from Omaha! And just in case I don't get the chance to blog before the holidays, Merry Christmas and Happy New Year! (btw, eff you in advance to everyone who wishes me a "Happy New Year's". You're a grammatical idiot and I hate you)
Charmin Extra Strong: HOW HARD ARE YOU PEOPLE WIPING YOUR ASSES? I have never had this thought after doing my business: "Oh no! Pieces left behind! If only they made stronger toilet paper to accommodate my super human butt wiping strength!" It's a sensitive area people, be gentle! And it's not going to run away, it's your own stationary ass, you don't need to trap it. Simply clean up and move on. Calm down before you go there. I don't get it.
McDonald's McRib Sandwich: um... gross. For one thing, I'm never eating "rib meat" from McDonald's. But more importantly, why is it shaped like an actual rack of ribs? Most people are aware that a rack of ribs includes bones between the rib meat. So is McDonald's trying to simulate bones but instead of using actual bones, it's processed "rib meat"? That's horrifying. What would possibly posses someone to eat such a wretched piece of OBVIOUSLY fake food? I mean let's all be honest here, ALL of the food at McDonald's is fake, but at least it's shaped realistically like the real deal. McRib isn't something I'd touch with a ten foot pole. Fake meat shaped like bones. I don't get it.
Inappropriate suggestions for wedding registries: We have a few registries at different stores and one of them comes with suggestions about what to put on your registry. Great, right? Except some of them are completely inappropriate! A few of them are for lady shavers. Like I'm going to put that on my registry and say to every guest who looks at it "Hi wedding guest! Want to buy us this trimmer so I can keep up my lady bits?" Um... no thanks. WHO would add that to their registry? I feel uncomfortable enough adding an electric toothbrush to our registry! I need a new electric toothbrush and it's a totally normal thing, but it just feels too personal for a registry! Same goes for sheets! (We are, in fact, registering for sheets and an electric toothbrush, but it still feels weird). What employee thought that was a good suggestion? It's awkward! I don't get it.
Panda Express and their fork stinginess: Every couple of weeks Dane and I have Panda Express as our Friday night dinner "out". I pick it up on my way home from work. I get 2 3-item meals (don't judge how much I eat, I eat the leftovers the next day, jerks). Sometimes I go through the drive-thru, sometimes I go in an order at the counter. But it's always 2 meals. And every time they give me 1 or NO fork(s)! Do I look like I'm going to eat both meals? Come on! And when they don't give me any forks: am I supposed to eat both meals with my hands? The Pandas in AZ are pros at the fork distribution. They give you two napkins and a fork for every meal. Perfection. They're good at the fortune cookie hand out too. Not here. These rookies are new in town and it shows. Just hand out the number of forks equal to the number of meals I got. Why is this so difficult for them? I don't get it.
Dorothy Lynch salad dressing: For everyone who doesn't live in Nebraska or Iowa, Dorothy Lynch dressing is this hugely popular dressing that you can only find in the Midwest. Everyone here is obsessed with it. They talk about it like you're stupid for not knowing what is it and they're all shocked that it's not a national product. Um... here's the thing: it IS a national product. Except everywhere else, we just call it French dressing. So get off your Midwestern high horse and relax. We've all had it before but aren't obsessed with it because French dressing sucks. Stop acting like it's such a big deal, no one cares. I don't get it.
Husker football: The is by far the most annoying part of living in Nebraska. I don't mind the cold and I don't mind the snow, but the obsession with the local college football team makes me want to punch babies. It's a college football team. They're in the Holiday Bowl against Washington. I don't want to ruin the ending for you, but Nebraska's going to win. Get a hobby. Might I suggest building a Macy's or Nordstrom? Because I would much rather hear about those things than your silly football team. Maybe if they were a professional team, I'd care. But they're not, so I don't. Stop acting like Husker football is a religion. I'm Presbyterian, not Huskerian. I don't get it.
How Bravo thinks this new sham of a show The Fashion Show is somehow going to make up for their lack of Project Runway: Um... no. I don't know these people, I don't care about their designs, and I'd like to know why Iman is so angry all the time. You had the perfect fashion design show and you blew it. Don't try to make up for it now with Isaac Mizrahi. But you're lucky, this week's episode with the Housewives may have just saved you. But only because you got Dina from NJ. Don't think this success of me watching is going to continue for much longer. Why would you ever get rid of Project Runway?! I don't get it.
Those commercials for medical assistant schools: They always go something like this: "I used to hate my job, but then after a few short months at this craptacular school, I have a great job where I work alongside doctors!" Ok let's start off at the beginning on this one: I feel there are very few careers worth doing that take "only a few short months" of school to be prepare for. But that's not even the big picture here. The big picture is how we're supposed to believe that working alongside doctors is some kind of dream come true. Now if you happen to have a career that coincidentally is near where doctors work, (ie R.N.) then good for you. Your job is legit. But whatever it is that these "few short months" careers entail, I can assure you that the treat of working alongside a doctor is not going to make up for it. Because where is the prize in working alongside a doctor? You know who's going to be a doctor? Dane. You know who I would never want to work alongside? Dane. Clearly, I'm a pretty big fan of Daneish. In our at-home, non-work related lives. Dane wouldn't want to work alongside me and vice versa. I'm annoying and fake at work. Dane will be a stubborn, egotistical asshole at work. I pity the people who will have to work with him. At least in our relationship, I can tell him to shut the hell up and we can bicker and go back to having fun together. You can't do that at work. Especially if your coworker is a doctor and you went to school "for a few short months". Just sayin', that confrontation is not going to go your way or end in your favor. I don't care if this one makes me sound like an bitch with a bachelors degree. This bitch worked hard for that degree. Let's talk about people who are too lazy to go to real college. I don't get it.
People who "don't really watch tv": um... why the hell not? People who say crap like that are usually the most annoying people ever. And watching the Real Housewives or The Sing-Off never hurt anyone! So stop being pretentious and watch some freaking tv. Maybe it'll help remove that stick from your ass. And while you're at it, stop trying to talk to me about music like it matters. My favorite kind on music? Christmas music. So stop acting all hipster on me and leave me alone. Watch some Bravo and then we'll talk. But not watching tv? I don't get it.
Why wine is so expensive: it's old grapes, right? They take grapes and smash them and then let them go bad while they sit in old barrels. Why does this gross process allow them to charge so much for a bottle of the fermented smashed grapes? I will admit, it's clearly delicious, so that adds some cost to the yummy, but where does the rest of the price come into play? Stop making me poor just so I can enjoy a glass of wine after a long day of dealing with the general public! Why must wine be so out of my budget? I don't get it.
Why iPhone users are such assholes. There's no story behind this one because everyone is fully aware of it. If you have an iPhone, you're probably an asshole. Congrats on being the friend that nobody likes. I don't care about all of the things your phone can do that my blackberry can't. I don't use my blackberry to its full capacity as it is, I don't need to add an annoying touch screen and an elitist attitude to become an iPhone user. So suck it. If it's so simple and user-friendly, why are you such an asshole? I don't get it.
Alright folks, that's all I have for now. We all know there are millions of other things I don't get. These are simply the ones that stand out to me right now. Peace out from Omaha! And just in case I don't get the chance to blog before the holidays, Merry Christmas and Happy New Year! (btw, eff you in advance to everyone who wishes me a "Happy New Year's". You're a grammatical idiot and I hate you)
Saturday, December 4, 2010
Our Christmas Letter
If we were one of those couples that sent out a Christmas letter to everyone we know, this is what this years would say. I will preface this with a reminder that we are NOT, I repeat: NOT one of those couples who send out a Christmas letter. For one thing, I'm not paying for stamps to update people on our lives. If you deserve/want to know, you'll call me and we'll talk because we're close personal friends. But the most important reason why we don't send out a Christmas letter is because we're not fucking annoying. I'm sorry, I know I don't usually blog that kind of language, but I felt it was necessary in this instance to properly convey my intense distaste for Christmas letters. Now don't get me wrong: I LOVE reading other people's Christmas letters. They're usually either super boring or super hilarious. The best of these is when they're not intentionally hilarious. A few years ago, a distant relative of ours sent out the most depressing Christmas letter I've ever seen. It included events in the year such as multiple family member deaths, the onset of blindness due to an illness, and the loss of a job. Um... maybe this was a good year to skip the Christmas letter. Because I just read it and was forced to kill myself because of the deep depression that came over me. Also, you're blind and unemployed, maybe save the money you spent on stamps to pay for dinner. Just sayin'... Ok, so here's our hypothetical Christmas letter. And I'm only doing this because 2010 has been such a cool year:
Well folks, 2010 has been a big year full of major changes for us!
The beginning of the year had us in Arizona, both working full time and savings our pennies for what we knew would be a lot of changes in the coming year. Dane was living in Tempe and working as an emergency room scribe at a couple different Valley hospitals. I was living with my parents in Paradise Valley and working as an assistant manager at Massage Envy while also nannying for a fantastic family who I now miss immensely!
April brought my birthday and not a whole lot else. Go 23!
May brought the first big change for us: Dane proposed! He put a lot of time and effort into planning a romantic evening for us and both impressed and surprised me. I have yet to come up with an abridged version of the proposal story but the general overview includes Trader Vic's for dinner, a gorgeous room at the Hotel Valley Ho, and a big box of every single tangible piece of our four year relationship. The ring is absolutely gorgeous and I revel in getting compliments on it quite regularly. (Many of these may be due to the fact that I unnecessarily flash it as much as possible. Any movement that CAN be done with my hand palm-down, IS done with my hand palm-down. I can't help it, my ring is gorgeous and I'm a slut for showing it off).
July brought our 4th date-i-versary (what I call our anniversary b/c we're not married so it's not really an anniversary) and our biggest change yet: we moved to Omaha, NE! (And Dane turned 23!)
August brought the start of medical school for Dane and he's been doing sensationally! His grades are very impressive and he's doing very well with the heavy work load. I am honestly so impressed with his work ethic. I always knew he was a good student, but his dedication to this is like he was born to be a med student.
We don't get to spend a whole lot of time together because his evenings and weekends are usually filled with studying, but we have dinner together most nights and sometimes get the chance to watch a football game together on the weekends.
September brought the start of my job! I hadn't looked much before we moved, so I feel especially blessed that I was only unemployed for a month! I spend my days at work and am enjoying learning more about the banking industry, but mostly I love having a place to get up and go to every day. (And yes, I'm specifically NOT mentioning where I work, because I would like to remain employed. Methinks some of the big wigs might not love my pointless blog mentioning their Fortune 500 company.) I spend my nights making dinners, watching tv, and drinking pinot noir. My partners in crime are Eddie, our dog and Heidi, our cat (but they don't get any wine, they're underage). My weekends are filled with either more work or laundry, cleaning, and errand running. Luckily work is right by a Target and a grocery store, so I can run mandatory errands on my lunch break or on my way home. My mom came to visit at the end of September and it was very much needed for me. It was nice to have a familiar face around Omaha and a buddy to go shopping with :)
October was full of training for me and lots of school work for Dane. I went to Oregon the first weekend of the month for my gram's birthday. It was great to see my extended family and get a weekend away from the stresses of work here in Omaha. The trip was super fun but too short! Dane and I didn't do anything for Halloween because he had a test the following day, so we celebrated by having an awkward dinner of latkes.
November brought Dane's first trip home since the move and he was very excited! He had a great few days home and I had a great few days with the house to myself. Don't get me wrong, I love Daneish, but I also love my alone time. Eddie and I went down to Kansas City for Thanksgiving to spend it with my MOH (for those of you not up on wedding abbreviations, that's Maid of Honor) Sam and her parents. It was a quick 24 hour trip so I could get back for work on Friday, but we both had a blast. Eddie loved getting attention from new people and I loved getting to be around my Midwestern family again. The downer to this trip was the speeding ticket I got in Iowa on the drive home. Yes, I got a speeding ticket ON Thanksgiving. Thanks to this, I will now NEVER spend money in Iowa. Congratulations Iowa! I have a shopping problem and you just screwed yourself out of it. Enjoy the speeding fine.
December has been good to us thus far. The Christmas spirit has hit me hard this year so I'm doing everything I can to spread Christmas cheer. I've roped some coworkers into adopting a senior citizen in need and am looking forward to delivering gifts to her! Another awesome perk of Christmastime is that my salon supports the Omaha Food Bank, so my canned food donation got me a free paraffin dip for my hands today! Sweet! I got rid of some food that we were probably never going to eat AND got to feel extra pampered! Christmas is absolutely my favorite time of year, so I've decorated our apartment with lots of twinkle lights and am probably annoying Daneish with my holiday mugs and tree-scented candles. I'm actually hoping for a big snow so I can have a white Christmas. (Well, Christmas week b/c I'll be in AZ on Christmas day). Dane is excitedly getting through the next couple of weeks of school before he gets to go home to AZ. I don't get to go home for very long, but my few days there will be great! We'll be taking our engagement pictures, having our food and cake tastings for the reception, and best of all: MY FIRST WEDDING DRESS FITTING!! I am beyond excited to see my dress and get to play with my shoes, etc. We're also going to make this the first Christmas we actually spend together. We usually don't cross paths on Christmas until nighttime, but we're going to try to combine things a little more this year, mostly because we're engaged and it's weird if we don't. It's just tough because we both love our own family celebrations and are not great at being flexible to fit in other events. Also, our families both live in the Valley, so we have a lot of stops to make for the holidays. But we're going to work on it because next year we'll be married and then it'll be REALLY weird if we don't spend Christmas together. We'll be back in Omaha for the New Year but haven't yet figured out how we'll celebrate. Probably our usual: sweats on the couch with pizza, watch the ball drop on tv, then bedtime. New Years Eve isn't really our holiday, but maybe we'll be more exciting this year. We'll see!
2010 has been a great year for us and I'm sure 2011 will be even better. We with you and yours a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year! Feel free to come visit us any time you'd like! If you can handle the cold and snow, we'd love to have you!
Well folks, 2010 has been a big year full of major changes for us!
The beginning of the year had us in Arizona, both working full time and savings our pennies for what we knew would be a lot of changes in the coming year. Dane was living in Tempe and working as an emergency room scribe at a couple different Valley hospitals. I was living with my parents in Paradise Valley and working as an assistant manager at Massage Envy while also nannying for a fantastic family who I now miss immensely!
April brought my birthday and not a whole lot else. Go 23!
May brought the first big change for us: Dane proposed! He put a lot of time and effort into planning a romantic evening for us and both impressed and surprised me. I have yet to come up with an abridged version of the proposal story but the general overview includes Trader Vic's for dinner, a gorgeous room at the Hotel Valley Ho, and a big box of every single tangible piece of our four year relationship. The ring is absolutely gorgeous and I revel in getting compliments on it quite regularly. (Many of these may be due to the fact that I unnecessarily flash it as much as possible. Any movement that CAN be done with my hand palm-down, IS done with my hand palm-down. I can't help it, my ring is gorgeous and I'm a slut for showing it off).
July brought our 4th date-i-versary (what I call our anniversary b/c we're not married so it's not really an anniversary) and our biggest change yet: we moved to Omaha, NE! (And Dane turned 23!)
August brought the start of medical school for Dane and he's been doing sensationally! His grades are very impressive and he's doing very well with the heavy work load. I am honestly so impressed with his work ethic. I always knew he was a good student, but his dedication to this is like he was born to be a med student.
We don't get to spend a whole lot of time together because his evenings and weekends are usually filled with studying, but we have dinner together most nights and sometimes get the chance to watch a football game together on the weekends.
September brought the start of my job! I hadn't looked much before we moved, so I feel especially blessed that I was only unemployed for a month! I spend my days at work and am enjoying learning more about the banking industry, but mostly I love having a place to get up and go to every day. (And yes, I'm specifically NOT mentioning where I work, because I would like to remain employed. Methinks some of the big wigs might not love my pointless blog mentioning their Fortune 500 company.) I spend my nights making dinners, watching tv, and drinking pinot noir. My partners in crime are Eddie, our dog and Heidi, our cat (but they don't get any wine, they're underage). My weekends are filled with either more work or laundry, cleaning, and errand running. Luckily work is right by a Target and a grocery store, so I can run mandatory errands on my lunch break or on my way home. My mom came to visit at the end of September and it was very much needed for me. It was nice to have a familiar face around Omaha and a buddy to go shopping with :)
October was full of training for me and lots of school work for Dane. I went to Oregon the first weekend of the month for my gram's birthday. It was great to see my extended family and get a weekend away from the stresses of work here in Omaha. The trip was super fun but too short! Dane and I didn't do anything for Halloween because he had a test the following day, so we celebrated by having an awkward dinner of latkes.
November brought Dane's first trip home since the move and he was very excited! He had a great few days home and I had a great few days with the house to myself. Don't get me wrong, I love Daneish, but I also love my alone time. Eddie and I went down to Kansas City for Thanksgiving to spend it with my MOH (for those of you not up on wedding abbreviations, that's Maid of Honor) Sam and her parents. It was a quick 24 hour trip so I could get back for work on Friday, but we both had a blast. Eddie loved getting attention from new people and I loved getting to be around my Midwestern family again. The downer to this trip was the speeding ticket I got in Iowa on the drive home. Yes, I got a speeding ticket ON Thanksgiving. Thanks to this, I will now NEVER spend money in Iowa. Congratulations Iowa! I have a shopping problem and you just screwed yourself out of it. Enjoy the speeding fine.
December has been good to us thus far. The Christmas spirit has hit me hard this year so I'm doing everything I can to spread Christmas cheer. I've roped some coworkers into adopting a senior citizen in need and am looking forward to delivering gifts to her! Another awesome perk of Christmastime is that my salon supports the Omaha Food Bank, so my canned food donation got me a free paraffin dip for my hands today! Sweet! I got rid of some food that we were probably never going to eat AND got to feel extra pampered! Christmas is absolutely my favorite time of year, so I've decorated our apartment with lots of twinkle lights and am probably annoying Daneish with my holiday mugs and tree-scented candles. I'm actually hoping for a big snow so I can have a white Christmas. (Well, Christmas week b/c I'll be in AZ on Christmas day). Dane is excitedly getting through the next couple of weeks of school before he gets to go home to AZ. I don't get to go home for very long, but my few days there will be great! We'll be taking our engagement pictures, having our food and cake tastings for the reception, and best of all: MY FIRST WEDDING DRESS FITTING!! I am beyond excited to see my dress and get to play with my shoes, etc. We're also going to make this the first Christmas we actually spend together. We usually don't cross paths on Christmas until nighttime, but we're going to try to combine things a little more this year, mostly because we're engaged and it's weird if we don't. It's just tough because we both love our own family celebrations and are not great at being flexible to fit in other events. Also, our families both live in the Valley, so we have a lot of stops to make for the holidays. But we're going to work on it because next year we'll be married and then it'll be REALLY weird if we don't spend Christmas together. We'll be back in Omaha for the New Year but haven't yet figured out how we'll celebrate. Probably our usual: sweats on the couch with pizza, watch the ball drop on tv, then bedtime. New Years Eve isn't really our holiday, but maybe we'll be more exciting this year. We'll see!
2010 has been a great year for us and I'm sure 2011 will be even better. We with you and yours a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year! Feel free to come visit us any time you'd like! If you can handle the cold and snow, we'd love to have you!
Thursday, November 11, 2010
Don't worry, we're alive
Well, the last few weeks have been super busy, hence no blog post. But I have a few minutes before bed, so here's a mini-update! I've finished training at work, so am a full-fledged employee now, with sales goals and everything! It's tough because I don't have an office of my own, but I'm determined to make the best of it and succeed anyway! I really like how work is going, everyone is super helpful and I'm just really excited to work for such a great company where I can really start a legit career. So that's work.
And now life: I've been spending my weekends as usual: laundry, cleaning, running errands, and car shenanigans! I have become a pro at checking the air in tires, taking a car in to get a flat fixed, adding antifreeze, adding wiper fluid, and replacing wiper blades! I'm feeling pretty proud of how much I've embraced the "manly" jobs that have now fallen to me. I don't love it, but I can do it. And I like being able to handle things like that without having to ask for help. I mean, I still sometimes play the helpless blonde card, but only when absolutely necessary :)
As for today (Veterans Day/Founders Day), I've been super productive and I'm really proud of myself. Here was my day:
Got up at 7, took Eddie for a walk and made Dane's lunch. Worked out, added fluids to my car and replaced the wiper blades (this took a while and I did it wrong a couple times, but I got it figured out! I'm uber proud!) Had breakfast, cleaned the bathroom, vacuumed the whole apartment, cleaned the litter box, and dealt with the dishes sitting in the sink. Showered and got ready for the day, had lunch, organized my closet, and left for my errands! Dealt with a return at the hardware store (NOT an easy task, the employee who was "helping" me was barely competent), used the vacuum at the car wash to vacuum my car, bought the spring form pan I needed from Target, and went to Hallmark to look at wedding invitations! Here's how Momza and I did it: we both went to our local Hallmarks and looked at the same invitation books together, over the phone! We found one we really like, so now I just have to talk Dane into agreeing with us :) Then I went to the grocery store, came back home and got ready for my lovely evening. I recorded one of those creepy recordable books from Hallmark for my nephew (sorry for ruining the surprise, Miche), made a yummy mahi mahi dinner (less yummy for Daneish, his piece had lots of bones. Not my fault: I bought boneless fish!!), hemmed some pants for a coworker who was being ghetto fab with staples in her pants, did my nails in an awesome red for fall: Essie's "A-list", and (now) blogged! (AND b/c today was a holiday, I got paid for all of this!!) All of these fabulous evening activities have been accompanied by a (larger than usual) glass of freaking amazing pinot noir. Mirassou, will you marry me? Because I can't quit you. Today at the store I bought a new bottle I've never tried before: Lindemans (also pinot noir, I'm not fixing it because it's not broke). We'll bust open the new bottle this weekend and I'll review it later. It's from Autralia, so it's probs awesome. And I hope it comes with a sexy accent. Or gives me a sexy accent when I drink it. However, I guess any wine could give you a sexy accent if you drink enough of it. Well, you'd think it was sexy, all the sober people around would probably just want you to shut the hell up.
Ok kids, that's all for now. Time for bed because I've gots to get up early to go work my booty off and bring home the bacon! P.S. It's supposed to snow on Saturday. I hate everything. Until then, cold/rainy. But never fear, I have my houndstooth rain boots and umbrella (yes, they're BOTH houndstooth) ready to go! AND tomorrow is a jeans day at work, aka BEST DAY EVER. AND we get a free lunch b/c out sales were awesome a couple weeks ago. YESSSSSSSSSS
And now life: I've been spending my weekends as usual: laundry, cleaning, running errands, and car shenanigans! I have become a pro at checking the air in tires, taking a car in to get a flat fixed, adding antifreeze, adding wiper fluid, and replacing wiper blades! I'm feeling pretty proud of how much I've embraced the "manly" jobs that have now fallen to me. I don't love it, but I can do it. And I like being able to handle things like that without having to ask for help. I mean, I still sometimes play the helpless blonde card, but only when absolutely necessary :)
As for today (Veterans Day/Founders Day), I've been super productive and I'm really proud of myself. Here was my day:
Got up at 7, took Eddie for a walk and made Dane's lunch. Worked out, added fluids to my car and replaced the wiper blades (this took a while and I did it wrong a couple times, but I got it figured out! I'm uber proud!) Had breakfast, cleaned the bathroom, vacuumed the whole apartment, cleaned the litter box, and dealt with the dishes sitting in the sink. Showered and got ready for the day, had lunch, organized my closet, and left for my errands! Dealt with a return at the hardware store (NOT an easy task, the employee who was "helping" me was barely competent), used the vacuum at the car wash to vacuum my car, bought the spring form pan I needed from Target, and went to Hallmark to look at wedding invitations! Here's how Momza and I did it: we both went to our local Hallmarks and looked at the same invitation books together, over the phone! We found one we really like, so now I just have to talk Dane into agreeing with us :) Then I went to the grocery store, came back home and got ready for my lovely evening. I recorded one of those creepy recordable books from Hallmark for my nephew (sorry for ruining the surprise, Miche), made a yummy mahi mahi dinner (less yummy for Daneish, his piece had lots of bones. Not my fault: I bought boneless fish!!), hemmed some pants for a coworker who was being ghetto fab with staples in her pants, did my nails in an awesome red for fall: Essie's "A-list", and (now) blogged! (AND b/c today was a holiday, I got paid for all of this!!) All of these fabulous evening activities have been accompanied by a (larger than usual) glass of freaking amazing pinot noir. Mirassou, will you marry me? Because I can't quit you. Today at the store I bought a new bottle I've never tried before: Lindemans (also pinot noir, I'm not fixing it because it's not broke). We'll bust open the new bottle this weekend and I'll review it later. It's from Autralia, so it's probs awesome. And I hope it comes with a sexy accent. Or gives me a sexy accent when I drink it. However, I guess any wine could give you a sexy accent if you drink enough of it. Well, you'd think it was sexy, all the sober people around would probably just want you to shut the hell up.
Ok kids, that's all for now. Time for bed because I've gots to get up early to go work my booty off and bring home the bacon! P.S. It's supposed to snow on Saturday. I hate everything. Until then, cold/rainy. But never fear, I have my houndstooth rain boots and umbrella (yes, they're BOTH houndstooth) ready to go! AND tomorrow is a jeans day at work, aka BEST DAY EVER. AND we get a free lunch b/c out sales were awesome a couple weeks ago. YESSSSSSSSSS
Thursday, October 21, 2010
EAT THIS
I made the most awesome chili in the history of chili. And it's super easy so you should make it, too! Here is my recipe!
Ingredients:
Directions:
Clearly, I make my chili in my crock pot (shout out to Dane's stepmom, Tracy for the crock pot house warming gift!! Thanks for making my life easier!!) and let it cook all day. I love it because I can throw it all together in the morning before work and when I get home at night, dinner is ready! This is how I would recommend making your chili, simply because it's so easy, but you can do it on the stove in a couple hours, too! Of course, you don't actually NEED a couple hours to make it on the stove, it just tastes better when it has time to soak up the yummy spices. And you'll definitely need to let it simmer for a while if you add the masa to thicken it, it'll taste grainy if the masa doesn't cook enough. And that's it! I add chopped onions and shredded cheese to mine when I eat it and it's SO GOOD!! I'm very happy with how my latest batch turned out today! It was plenty hot for Daneish's tastes and just generally yummy! However, I apparently need to teach Daneish the crock pot rule. If he'd been raised in my family (let's all be glad he wasn't though, because that'd be weird when we go to apply for a marriage license) he would know that if there is something cooking in a crock pot, every time you go into the kitchen, you stir it, scraping all the sides so it doesn't stick. I definitely had chili stuck to the sides of my crock pot tonight because SOMEBODY didn't stir the chili while he was home today. But he's had a long day today, so I'm willing to give him a break and teach him the crock pot rule. But if this happens again, he'd better watch his back!
Well, you already know tonight's menu, so I'll fill you in on last night's menu (salmon, wild rice, and green beans) and tomorrow's menu (either leftover chili or chipotle, it's up to Daneish)
Best part of the week so far: meeting a big wig of my region at work. However, he put quite a conundrum in my noggin. I had always planned on stopping working as soon as we can afford for me to so that I can be at home to raise our future children. But after hearing him speak today, I'm really inspired and kind of excited by the idea of being able to have a big career of my own. But this really adds a lot more things for me to think about, like if the guilt of being a working mom would be too much for me to handle, if we'll even be able to find a daycare that we trust enough to watch our genetically superior children (obviously our kids will be genetically superior, have you SEEN the two of us?), and if Dane and I could keep any semblance of a real relationship if we're both working our butts off at the same time to get to where we want to be in our respective careers. So this is definitely weighing on my mind right now and I'm trying to figure out how I really feel about it. I know Dane will support me either way, but he'd probably actually prefer that I keep working as long as possible because it'll put us in a better financial position as well as keep me occupied :) The good part is that we don't need to make any kind of a decision for many years! There won't be any little kiddies for at least 5 years and even though we won't be able to afford to live on Dane's residency income, so I'll still be working for a while after kiddies anyway! So that's where my mind is right now, but I probably won't come to any resolution until we have the time to sit down and really look at all our options. And I'm sure our decision will change every time a new opportunity at work comes along, so we'll just have to wait and see! It would be pretty cool to be a big wig at work though... :)
What I'm most looking forward to: getting our apartment cleaned up this weekend! I've been busy with training all week, so things have kind of piled up. I can't wait to get it all cleaned and organized again!
Best blessing in disguise this week: my car battery dying yesterday! Not only did 2 ridiculously good looking firemen jump my car, but I got some down time by myself (very rare!!) while Sears was replacing it to wander around Target and finish our registry. The scanny gun thing was super fun and I got our registry all rounded out! We still need to add bedding and towels, etc. but we'll have to do that together! And everything else is done, so feel free to buy us stuff!! Everyone knows I'm really only marrying Dane so I can get new knives and pots and pans!
Ok that's all for tonight, it's time to paint my nails in preparation for my first day at my real job tomorrow! Feel free to make requests for any blog post topics you'd like to hear my opinion on! As you all know, I have many opinions! Happy upcoming weekend, everyone!
Ingredients:
- Carroll Shelby's Chili Kit (It's in a little brown box in the grocery store and it makes chili super easy, so you should get it because it'll save you tons of time and money instead of measuring out your own spices)
- 1 pound ground beef
- 1 green bell pepper
- 2 onions (1 for the chili, one for you to chop up to put on top of each bowl!)
- 2 10oz. cans RO*TEL diced tomatoes and green chilies (it all comes together in 1 can, kids)
- 1 4oz. can green chilies (mild)
- 3 15oz. cans of beans (this is where you get to have fun: pick your faves! My fam varies on our beans of choice for chili, but my favorites are dark red kidney beans, white kidney beans [aka Cannellini], and either pinto or chili beans. I get 1 can of each)
- a smidge of shredded cheddar cheese to put on top of each bowl of chili!
- 1 glass of wine, to be enjoyed while cooking
- 1 beer, to be enjoyed while eating your final product :)
Directions:
- In a skillet, brown the ground beef until just done. (If you're going to be doing this in a crock pot for an extended period of time (more than a couple hours) brown it until still pretty rare, it'll cook more when it's chili!)
- While the hamburger is cooking, chop the bell pepper and onion. How small you chop it will depend on your preferences and how long you plan on cooking it. If it's going to cook in a crock pot all day, they cook down to smaller pieces, so cut bigger chunks so they have room to shrink.
- Drain the grease from the ground beef into your handy dandy grease jar (mine lives in the freezer b/c grease is gross and I am less grossed out by it if it's frozen into a solid form)
- Toss the ground beef, bell pepper, and onion into your big pot. Add the beans (don't drain them! add the liquid too!), tomatoes and green chilies (again, don't drain!), green chilies (don't even think about draining this can), and large spice bag.
- If you're Daneish or cooking for Daneish, add the entire cayene packet. If you're a wimp, don't add this packet.
- If you're going to be letting this cook for a while, I recommend adding the masa packet because it gets thin when it cooks for hours. It's super easy, just mix with masa packet with 1/3 cup water and toss it in the pot!
- Now just stir it all together (make sure you stir well, the spices have a tendency to clump) and let it cook on a low heat for as long as you can wait until you simply must devour it!!
Clearly, I make my chili in my crock pot (shout out to Dane's stepmom, Tracy for the crock pot house warming gift!! Thanks for making my life easier!!) and let it cook all day. I love it because I can throw it all together in the morning before work and when I get home at night, dinner is ready! This is how I would recommend making your chili, simply because it's so easy, but you can do it on the stove in a couple hours, too! Of course, you don't actually NEED a couple hours to make it on the stove, it just tastes better when it has time to soak up the yummy spices. And you'll definitely need to let it simmer for a while if you add the masa to thicken it, it'll taste grainy if the masa doesn't cook enough. And that's it! I add chopped onions and shredded cheese to mine when I eat it and it's SO GOOD!! I'm very happy with how my latest batch turned out today! It was plenty hot for Daneish's tastes and just generally yummy! However, I apparently need to teach Daneish the crock pot rule. If he'd been raised in my family (let's all be glad he wasn't though, because that'd be weird when we go to apply for a marriage license) he would know that if there is something cooking in a crock pot, every time you go into the kitchen, you stir it, scraping all the sides so it doesn't stick. I definitely had chili stuck to the sides of my crock pot tonight because SOMEBODY didn't stir the chili while he was home today. But he's had a long day today, so I'm willing to give him a break and teach him the crock pot rule. But if this happens again, he'd better watch his back!
Well, you already know tonight's menu, so I'll fill you in on last night's menu (salmon, wild rice, and green beans) and tomorrow's menu (either leftover chili or chipotle, it's up to Daneish)
Best part of the week so far: meeting a big wig of my region at work. However, he put quite a conundrum in my noggin. I had always planned on stopping working as soon as we can afford for me to so that I can be at home to raise our future children. But after hearing him speak today, I'm really inspired and kind of excited by the idea of being able to have a big career of my own. But this really adds a lot more things for me to think about, like if the guilt of being a working mom would be too much for me to handle, if we'll even be able to find a daycare that we trust enough to watch our genetically superior children (obviously our kids will be genetically superior, have you SEEN the two of us?), and if Dane and I could keep any semblance of a real relationship if we're both working our butts off at the same time to get to where we want to be in our respective careers. So this is definitely weighing on my mind right now and I'm trying to figure out how I really feel about it. I know Dane will support me either way, but he'd probably actually prefer that I keep working as long as possible because it'll put us in a better financial position as well as keep me occupied :) The good part is that we don't need to make any kind of a decision for many years! There won't be any little kiddies for at least 5 years and even though we won't be able to afford to live on Dane's residency income, so I'll still be working for a while after kiddies anyway! So that's where my mind is right now, but I probably won't come to any resolution until we have the time to sit down and really look at all our options. And I'm sure our decision will change every time a new opportunity at work comes along, so we'll just have to wait and see! It would be pretty cool to be a big wig at work though... :)
What I'm most looking forward to: getting our apartment cleaned up this weekend! I've been busy with training all week, so things have kind of piled up. I can't wait to get it all cleaned and organized again!
Best blessing in disguise this week: my car battery dying yesterday! Not only did 2 ridiculously good looking firemen jump my car, but I got some down time by myself (very rare!!) while Sears was replacing it to wander around Target and finish our registry. The scanny gun thing was super fun and I got our registry all rounded out! We still need to add bedding and towels, etc. but we'll have to do that together! And everything else is done, so feel free to buy us stuff!! Everyone knows I'm really only marrying Dane so I can get new knives and pots and pans!
Ok that's all for tonight, it's time to paint my nails in preparation for my first day at my real job tomorrow! Feel free to make requests for any blog post topics you'd like to hear my opinion on! As you all know, I have many opinions! Happy upcoming weekend, everyone!
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
There! I fixed football. DONE.
Ok so I usually don't give much of a crap about sports, but my intake has greatly increased since moving in with Daneish. I now watch quite a bit of SportsCenter and many a professional game. Lately this has meant football and baseball. And from watching football this weekend, I have come to realize that something must be done. If you've heard anything about football recently, you know about the helmet to helmet hits that have occurred as of late. Now I'm not going to bother to do any further research about this topic because I'm done with school and it's my blog so I don't have to. But I think we can all agree that these intentional hits are increasing in both number and severity as of late. We'll get to my simple solution later, first let's look at the ridiculous arguments coming from both the players and the commentators on ESPN.
The most irritating to me is the "better to be hit too high than too low" comment. This suggests that your knees are so fragile that a single hit there can be completely crippling, so it's better to be hit higher. Um... I'm not sure if you've heard of Mike Utley*. Utley is the former Detroit Lions player who was forced to retire in his 3rd year in the NFL (1991) after he suffered an extreme hit that resulted in paralysis from the chest down. That's right, paralyzed. As in can't walk. As in is lucky to have use of his arms. [Please also take the time to do some internet searches on Eric LeGrand**. He's a Rutgers junior who suffered a spinal cord injury on Saturday that looks like it's going to end in paralysis from the neck down. He currently has no movement below his neck, but it's too early to have a more final diagnosis. This injury didn't result from a helmet to helmet hit, but it came from tackle he was making when he lead with his head. Clearly this was an accidental injury, there was a big crowd of players around so his hit was difficult to make. But it'a prime example of how a single hit to the head can have major repercussions for a long time to come.] But you're right ESPN commentators, getting hit in the knees is much better. Because knee replacements are pretty popular now, but vertebrae replacements are going to be AWESOME! Yes, a single hit in the knees can be career-ending and you will probably only suffer a concussion from a hit in the head. But there's also such a thing as too many concussions and there's also a hell of a chance that a single hit in the head will not only be career-ending, but also walk-ending, and quite possibly life-ending. So your knee argument is garbage and you should be embarrassed for sharing it on tv.
Another popular idea on ESPN today was that the National Football League facilitated the popularity of helmet to helmet hits because all of their promotional video and highlights feature the hardest of hits. I agree, they do sensationalize the hard hits. But there is a big difference between big tackles and getting another guys helmet thrown into your own. I think that all football players go into that job knowing that they're most definitely going to get hurt and may get hurt so badly that they are forced to stop playing football before they want to. Everyone knows that there are no old men in football (except Brett Favre, but we're all dying for him to retire for real. Move along Brett, your Wranglers await you. Real. Comfortable. Jeans.) because you simply can't play such a physical sport for a long time. Your body can't do it. But no football players enters the league with the idea that they have to be prepared for an illegal hit because the league facilitated it. Hard hits are to be expected, illegal hits are not. So the NFL can have all the highlights of big tackles they want, as long as they're all legal hits that encourage good sportsmanship.
The least convincing argument I heard today was that linemen can't stop their momentum or can't help making a head to head hit because they're moving so fast with so much momentum. Wait... these are professional athletes, right? It's their entire job to make tackles, right? And they practice this job from childhood with the same rules they are expected to follow in the NFL, right? So they've had years of practice doing this one job and we're supposed to believe that they aren't good enough at it to have a target area? Baseball pitchers have a strike zone, why don't football tackles have to adhere to a similar standard? Oh that's right, they should have to. So take your can't help it excuse elsewhere because it's not helping these injured players walk again.
AND here's my idea for punishment for offending players: yes they should be fined. But fines aren't enough for these guys who make millions. They need to be suspended. And these need to be suspensions that make an example of the offenders. Here's my creative idea of how these suspensions should work: minimum of 1 game suspension. Period. And if the guy they hit is injured? The offending player is suspended for the equal amount of games that his victim is out while recovering. And if the injury is career-ending? The regular football season is 16 games, so the offending player should be suspended for 8 games. The other guy will never play again, you can sit out half a season to have some time to think about what an asshole you are.
There! I fixed football. DONE.
*Ok, I did google that to figure out his actual name. So I guess I did some research...
My google? "Detroit Lions paralysis"
**I would not recommend ESPN's video of the hit. It's tough to watch and won't improve your mood. Stick to the print articles, no videos.
The most irritating to me is the "better to be hit too high than too low" comment. This suggests that your knees are so fragile that a single hit there can be completely crippling, so it's better to be hit higher. Um... I'm not sure if you've heard of Mike Utley*. Utley is the former Detroit Lions player who was forced to retire in his 3rd year in the NFL (1991) after he suffered an extreme hit that resulted in paralysis from the chest down. That's right, paralyzed. As in can't walk. As in is lucky to have use of his arms. [Please also take the time to do some internet searches on Eric LeGrand**. He's a Rutgers junior who suffered a spinal cord injury on Saturday that looks like it's going to end in paralysis from the neck down. He currently has no movement below his neck, but it's too early to have a more final diagnosis. This injury didn't result from a helmet to helmet hit, but it came from tackle he was making when he lead with his head. Clearly this was an accidental injury, there was a big crowd of players around so his hit was difficult to make. But it'a prime example of how a single hit to the head can have major repercussions for a long time to come.] But you're right ESPN commentators, getting hit in the knees is much better. Because knee replacements are pretty popular now, but vertebrae replacements are going to be AWESOME! Yes, a single hit in the knees can be career-ending and you will probably only suffer a concussion from a hit in the head. But there's also such a thing as too many concussions and there's also a hell of a chance that a single hit in the head will not only be career-ending, but also walk-ending, and quite possibly life-ending. So your knee argument is garbage and you should be embarrassed for sharing it on tv.
Another popular idea on ESPN today was that the National Football League facilitated the popularity of helmet to helmet hits because all of their promotional video and highlights feature the hardest of hits. I agree, they do sensationalize the hard hits. But there is a big difference between big tackles and getting another guys helmet thrown into your own. I think that all football players go into that job knowing that they're most definitely going to get hurt and may get hurt so badly that they are forced to stop playing football before they want to. Everyone knows that there are no old men in football (except Brett Favre, but we're all dying for him to retire for real. Move along Brett, your Wranglers await you. Real. Comfortable. Jeans.) because you simply can't play such a physical sport for a long time. Your body can't do it. But no football players enters the league with the idea that they have to be prepared for an illegal hit because the league facilitated it. Hard hits are to be expected, illegal hits are not. So the NFL can have all the highlights of big tackles they want, as long as they're all legal hits that encourage good sportsmanship.
The least convincing argument I heard today was that linemen can't stop their momentum or can't help making a head to head hit because they're moving so fast with so much momentum. Wait... these are professional athletes, right? It's their entire job to make tackles, right? And they practice this job from childhood with the same rules they are expected to follow in the NFL, right? So they've had years of practice doing this one job and we're supposed to believe that they aren't good enough at it to have a target area? Baseball pitchers have a strike zone, why don't football tackles have to adhere to a similar standard? Oh that's right, they should have to. So take your can't help it excuse elsewhere because it's not helping these injured players walk again.
AND here's my idea for punishment for offending players: yes they should be fined. But fines aren't enough for these guys who make millions. They need to be suspended. And these need to be suspensions that make an example of the offenders. Here's my creative idea of how these suspensions should work: minimum of 1 game suspension. Period. And if the guy they hit is injured? The offending player is suspended for the equal amount of games that his victim is out while recovering. And if the injury is career-ending? The regular football season is 16 games, so the offending player should be suspended for 8 games. The other guy will never play again, you can sit out half a season to have some time to think about what an asshole you are.
There! I fixed football. DONE.
*Ok, I did google that to figure out his actual name. So I guess I did some research...
My google? "Detroit Lions paralysis"
**I would not recommend ESPN's video of the hit. It's tough to watch and won't improve your mood. Stick to the print articles, no videos.
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